Friday, 26 February 2010

The Tale begins..........

Y am I blogging?? To be honest thought it’d be a larf to document my battle against the bulge, stuff I get up to, some of my thoughts & opinions blah,blah,Blllaaaaahhh. I love waaay too much so y not try something new, instead of leaving ma gums aching why not exercise ma finger tips!
How’d this sorry tale begin…….. WELL..Once upon a time, a looooooonnnnnggg lonnnnngggg time ago there was a girl called

Farah, she was a size 10/12:

and lived in, actually none of ya beez wax! Anywayz the size 10/12 Farah… became a size 14/16 Farah and the size 14/16 Farah, bored already… yup me too haha but in a nut shell I got FAT!!

See for yourself N.B distorted chubby face and no i'm not exaggertaing will upload a more recent pics soon:

To be honest the gaining of weight has many pro’s ask the Mr ;)…Pwwwaaaaahhhaaa and unfortunately loads of Con’s! ExampleS:

- the new and improved buxom, fruitful cleavage that once was although not struggling….was just average! :D
Note pic 1: New and improved tutty!! Pic 2: AVERAGE!LOL!

- the new found junk in ‘THAT TRUNK’ that although was probably always there was distributed unevenly and just didn’t feel or look as it does now!! And thaz all folks…..I know I said many I LIED …Pro’s all listed! :/

- The distortion of your face to the point that every time you see a pic of yourself on FB you’re like rah look at that chick and then you realise it’s you, looking like a hamster, ok that’s waaaaay too kind, a gerbil, no not quite there yet.. A guinea pig!!
- The fact that whereas before your clothing used to lay nicely over your mid-drift the (over) abundance of flesh now hangs over the waist band of your jeans, skirts, shorts to name a few garments!:0
- ‘FAT back’, ‘luv handles’, ‘bingo wings’, ‘turkey neck’ you get the picture…
- All of your work/office wear now looks VVVVVaaavaaaavooommm, too tight and bootylicious!! The knee length skirt that fell just above the knee now looks like a micro-mini
- You now have two tummy’s..TTTWWWOOO TUMMY’S WTF! All down to the blasted cold weather =ing the use of tights! Tights that were once your beloved friend (because you often got away with wearing skirts above the knee to work, with tights under, that would otherwise be inappropriate..hhahahahaha) are now your cursed ENEMY! They cut off the blood supply running through your tummy and leave you with, rather than one round unattractive tummy, a pair of ugly tummy twins!!!!!
- And finally the biggy when your thunder thighs that never used to thunder no longer have a GAP between them and on occasion feel the need to introduce themselves to each other by touching…actually touching!!:o At this point it’s all over and something DRASTIC needs to be done!!!

How did Size 10/12 Farah become size 14/16 Farah weighing more than she did when she was with child I hear you ask?? Plain and simply she got greedy, ate loads of the wrong stuff and became less active! How’s she gonna turn this all around??? Only the lord knows but I’ll blog it so you can all have a read and laugh at my expense!!Haha!!

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